Welcome to DouglasDeBono.Com, the Cyberspace Home of author Douglas De Bono

Welcome to DouglasDeBono.Com, the Cyberspace Home of
author Douglas De Bono.

SILLY SEASON

[Douglas De Bono / DouglasDeBono.Com]
The presidential year melodrama is in full swing and we have dragged ourselves to the quadrennial slugfest. The democrat’s standard bearer this time will be Senator John Kerry. He challenges President Bush for the Oval Office. Why anyone would want the job is beyond me.

Before we get to John Kerry and why he is the wrong man for the job [hint: check the photos associated with this article if you are confused about my position], consider the democratic field this year.

General Wesley Clark, who by some accounts nearly started World War III in Bosnia, is the gung-ho ground-pounder who wanted to attack the Russians. Only the cool resolve of a British General foiled the attempt. This is a man who joined the race, because he did not have anything else to do—certainly, another reminder not to elect anyone president, ever again from Arkansas.

Governor Howard Dean loves to tout his NRA rating, because Vermont is the only state that requires no permit to carry a weapon, proving that even a broken clock can be right twice a day. Of course, the rest of Howard’s positions: Gay Marriage, Abortion on demand, higher taxes, retreat in Iraq and anti-war are an anathema to thinking human beings.

Congressman Dick Gephardt was one of the few adults running for the presidency. While his views on trade probably would have left the economy in the outhouse, Gephardt at least had a marginal understanding that we are the good guys and al Qaeda et al are the bad guys. Dick never made it out of Iowa.

Senator Joseph Lieberman ran for Vice President with Al Gore. He might have even become Vice President if Al had managed to eek out a win in Tennessee. Besides being the other adult in the race, Lieberman failed to garner the endorsement of his running mate and no one on the democratic side wished to hear anything remotely supportive of George Bush.

Senator John Edwards campaigned like a house a fire in South Carolina. He figured six years in the Senate and 20 years as a trial lawyer qualified him for presidential timbre. Rush calls him the Breck-Girl and Hugh Hewitt dubbed him the Cherub. We finally got rid of one southern, bottom-feeding lawyer type four years ago, why would we elect another?

Then there are the kindergartners. The Reverend Al Sharpton’s campaign seems to be based on how-many-freebies-can-I-get-out-of-this-deal. He probably wonders what happened to America’s first black president, because he rarely sees Slick Willy anywhere near his Harlem office. If you managed to make it through any of the democratic debates, you are probably still trying to figure out what Al was talking about.

Carol Moseley-Braun wanted to run for Senate, but Donna Brazile and company feared that the Reverend Al might suck up the black vote and destroy the democratic party [NEWS FLASH: The Clintons and Terry McAuliffe are doing a great job by themselves.] So they convinced Moseley-Braun to run as a counter vote getter. She can make a box of rocks sound like a doctoral candidate.

Congressman Dennis Kucinish (sometimes called Dennis the Menace) former Cleveland Mayor, gives rise to the notion that he was original inspiration for E.T.—the Extra Terrestrial. I remember Dennis from the late 1970s. He was mayor when the Cuyahoga River caught fire. In my world, rivers are not supposed to catch fire; in Dennis’s world they do.

Which brings us to John Kerry, he has called the Bush foreign policy “inept, arrogant and ideologically flawed.” He can not figure out whether God is on our side or the Looney-Toons who flew planes into the World Trade Center. Besides gaining endorsements from Hillary Clinton (on Japanese Television—an odd venue), Howard Dean and Hanoi Jane—it appears North Korea’s Dear Leader Kim Jong Il kind of likes him too. He has voted against every major weapon system currently deployed by our armed forces, and then has the nerve to say our troops are not properly equipped. He promises to bring us back to the Clinton era (minus the Lewinsky problems) and rebuild our alliances (with friends like France, who needs enemies?).

Gee, John, what was George Bush supposed to do after September 11th? He went after the SOBs that attacked us and took down both Afghanistan’s Taliban regime and Saddam Hussein. Only someone who does not wish to see the truth would claim these were bad things to do.

Kerry has voted against everything from the Bradley Fighting Vehicle to the B2 bomber. I guess he expected our armed forces to call Osama bad names and hurt his feelings.

The French, German, Russian and Chinese governments were busy cutting deals for oil with Saddam and sending weapons to Iraq as fast as their clandestine shipments could make it from Syrian ports. Of course, they did not want us to get rid of their meal ticket.

Finally, as to whether God is on our side or the people trying to kill us [and this is probably going to get me more Islamic hate mail], I happen to believe God did not want 3000 people to die on September 11th. I do not believe He thought Saddam’s rape rooms and people shredders were good things. I doubt He approved the Taliban’s treatment of everyone except true believers.

Terrorist regimes are bad and they need to be deposed. Unfortunately, most of these regimes are either Muslim or atheist. Certainly they do not hold to a Judeo-Christian world view. Is the United States perfect—far from it; but for all of our failures (politically, culturally and morally), we remain Ronald Reagan’s shining city on the hill.

John Kerry is a man who wants to be all things to all people, rather than a man who can discern good from evil and right from wrong. Right now we need the clarity George Bush brings to the office, not the muddled self interest of another lack luster political hack.